I have earned my stripes and done the hard work of body positivity. My dad and, and by extension my family, believed shaming someone is how to get them to do the correct thing. They took tough love really seriously. 

A lot of people tell me now that my body type is beautiful, but I didn’t grow up hearing that. I haven’t always been showered with compliments. It doesn’t feel strange to hear it anymore, but I’ve also moved past being shocked that I’m now considered beautiful. But at what cost? Eating disorders? Hormonal issues? Weak bones? I do not wish it on anyone, and right now I am actively learning to love food again. I’ve been starving myself!! Literally!!

Having a DD cup and weighing 68kg at 15 meant I was fat. In fact, I was called an asawo as early as that age because I had stretch marks and to them, that was definitely a sign I was a promiscuous teenager. It turns out I had hormonal spurt, but who cares? There’s nothing like big boned, natural physique exemptions, IUD side effects, when it comes to body shaming. When people are determined to shame you, they’ll never hear reason.

So when I speak of body positivity, trust me, I have earned my stripes. And so have you. You have tongue-lashed yourself enough. It is time to stop body shaming yourself. Stop echoing the outside voices that tell you that you’re not beautiful or you deserve shame because you look or don’t look a certain way. Shaming is never an effective tool for motivation! Not as a chef, or a football player, or a woman. Kindness is a greater and long lasting motivation.

Confidence in yourself, in both physical traits and abstract abilities, is all you need to get what you want out of life. 

Xx.